Archive for the ‘Beaudesert Shopping Experiences.’ Category

Incident in Beaudesert.

March 17, 2017

A couple of weeks ago in the pre-rush a.m, I had occasion to be downtown in Greater Beaudesert where the proverbial cannon could be fired without hurting a soul. The early opening newsagency beckoned and with only one car out front, there was easy parking.

The mirror showed three cyclists in the ‘right turn only’ lane as I prepared to alight. The lead cyclist made a sharp swoop towards me as I stepped out. “The door, the door, the door,” the rider, with emblazoned club shirt screamed,” as he returned to the right turn lane and turned into Bromelton Road.

Evidently the classic do-gooder, do as I say, looking to fault anyone handy, reprimanding we presumed thoughtless drivers. This items’ forefathers would have prided themselves and felt justified when their kangaroo courts arbitrarily stretched the necks of innocents whose profile differed from theirs.

Retailer Pharmacists. As Ill-principled as the Medical Industry.

March 16, 2017

I presented early at Soul Pattinson, Beaudesert, first thing in fact, as the polite junior girl took the first of many mobile display units jamming the aisles to their places outside the shop.

“Can I help you,” proffered the senior shop assistant, as I neared the counter clutching my only reason for visiting such an establishment, a script needing filling.

“It’s the last repeat,” stressing the point, getting the jack of being told what I’m well aware of.

I sat down.

“Have you been here before,” she demanded, “I have that,” was my honest reply, surprised at the question, considering a few weeks before she had needlessly apologized for the short, normal wait.

“I’m not so important as to expect instant attention,” I had told her.

“Oh, but you are very important to us,” came the palavered reply

Minutes later the product had been taken from the shelf, re-stamped with my details, placed in a small tray and passed to the senior woman.

“That was the last repeat,” she echoed my words of a few minutes earlier.

“Am I so retarded that I’ve forgotten what I told you”?

“I’ve got to tell you that,” the comeback.

The previous visit I had had an amiable conversation with one of the proprietors about chemists’ penchant for claiming scripts as their property by wrapping them in their branded advertising and stapling together.

About that time, in the few metres between Woolworths and their shop, I had lost a gold ring and despite the futility of recovering such an item, had returned to the shop with my predicament. In other words, intelligent people would have remembered my presence.

Cash grabbing chemists look upon oldies as an assured and constant money source and like the rest of society, would prefer dealing with contrite, obedient non-thinking slabs of old meat.

An oldie scares the devil out of Beaudesert woman.

January 27, 2017


Was using Coles self checkout recently at a busy time when a clean-cut, middle-aged woman, of apparently normal mien was hesitant about squeezing her way to the only vacant machine, the other side of me. Took a few seconds off processing my stuff and rearranged my trolley allowing her access.

She looked at me in absolute horror and backed off,” I’m so terribly sorry,” she stammered.

“Why should you be sorry”? I asked. I hadn’t been abrupt or yanked the trolley in anger.

She repeated her apology. Quasimodo reputedly had a kind and gentle nature yet invariably got a bad press.

Transaction complete, went on my way, wondering if the woman hadn’t had a prescience flash.

Five Level Camp Cupboard, My Discovery Of Year: Specialised Power Equipment.

January 4, 2017

Camping has moved on quite a bit since partner and self made do with the protection from the elements that a tarp offered to those dossing down in the back of the ute.

Camping in Ute, winter.

A few months ago, a catalogue issued by Specialised Power Equipment of 140 Brisbane Street, opposite Toyoto, featured among many other products, a five shelf collapsible camp cupboard, price $65 while on sale, then $90.

5 Shelf camp cupboard.

Five Shelf camp cupboard.

At 140 cm or 55 inches, it’s quite ample for my simple needs, in this case, to store linen, my days of expensive furnishings well and truly in the past. The luckless Beaudesert renter who has no option but to rent an unscreened residence would find this product great for its purpose of protecting their foodstuffs and crockery/cutlery from fly and cockroach contamination.

Camp Cupboards (Catalogue)

Camp Cupboards (Catalogue)

Specialised Power would no doubt, carry mosquito nets, an item that should be history in the modern home but unscrupulous owners are allowed by the Queensland Labor Government to rent out unprotected premises to families. The product pictured under was obtained elsewhere for about $30.

Circular Style Mosquito Net.

Circular Style Mosquito Net.

Coles Beaudesert self checkout is an escape from Woolworth’s beggars.

November 4, 2016

“Enter The Big Pumpkin.”

Although shopping is more expensive at Coles, I’ll use them before Beaudesert Woolworths simply to dodge the front of shop professional beggars and being implored by Woolworths checkout staff to make another donation on exit.
If a ‘best thing about’ tag could be applied to shopping at Beaudesert Coles, it would have to be their self-checkout where, by definition, Woolworths checkout staff are unable to pester customers on exit to “make a $2 donation”.
To enter Woolworths via one of their two entrances, the shopper must run a gauntlet of beggars, usually gentle and pleasant do-gooders, but with the noticeable exception of an aged, unkempt loudmouth item of filth who persists with rude personal comments long after one has passed. Named Keith, “I am known as Father Christmas and everyone loves me.” he replied when I asked him to stop heckling me. “Beaudesert’s Malevolent Thug..”
The next best thing about using Coles is related to the ‘best thing’ in that no collectors of any persuasion are permitted to set up shop to harass clients. Nearest they had, a couple of months ago, in the car park, was a team of bimbos who would spray a section of your motor vehicle and buff if pretty while very nearly doing a lap dance to induce a sale of their product.
After twenty or so minutes, I managed to persuade the one working on me that such tactics are amusing but wasted on this tightwad old prick, did she piss off having found an urgent task to attend.

Coles: BT, Sept 28, 2016

Coles: BT, Sept 28, 2016

Coles, overtaken with altruism and a desire to be seen as generous benefactors and to distance themselves from the insidious effect of their poker machines, got involved with this facade of bullshit care as depicted in the Beaudesert Times story. Designed entirely for publicity purposes, thinly veiled, good enough to deceive the yokels while Coles/Woolworths poker machines strip millions of dollars from the low paid gullible.

Dodgy Kooralbyn R/Estate Operator Opens Diner, Writes Own Review.

June 29, 2016

Huang pays workers in bar tabs

Compliments Beaudesert Times.

Compliments Beaudesert Times.

Beaudesert Times: How she was writ in 2004 and them that was writ about.

April 17, 2016

Gleneagle Butcher, circa 2004Beaudesert Times, February 18, 2004.

You might be amused at the story’s characters and the lack of editing.

Yet to come across a more hilarious BT report than that of the Anglicans deliberately blown up mail-box and the effrontery of the parishioners. Especially distressing since recently, wait for it Laz and Gen, its sheer uniqueness had earned it seventh place in a letter-box competition.

At about that time, readers were elated to learn that Shire Council blue collar workers celebrated the coming festive season around a platter of meat pies.

Oldies Need The Right To Exit At Will, Not By Staged Accidents; ‘Lost’ While Walking; Gunshot.

March 31, 2016

For a reason best kept from Beaudesert Coles, when I food-shop locally,  Woolworths, by default, has become the provision source, but for their coy late opening time, would much prefer Aldi’s lower prices. Their piss-weak tea a major error of judgement.

My penchant for variety and change and a compulsion for the novelty can find me shopping anywhere in a wide arc from Boonah around to Logan Village. As well, one never knows what interesting characters could be waiting beyond the next curve of the road.

Woolworths has its quota of offensive oafs, seemingly without the faintest idea of their condition but few as unpleasant or disliked as the Coles misfit, Johanna or her tubby, sycophantic lickspittle, the lazy, impertinent ‘James.’

One mature but witless female had to be reminded that a sciatic limp wasn’t indicative of cretinism. So next visit found that I had been dispatched to Coles Coventry, snotty, limited iq noses upturned at unexpected retort.

Said to mature checkout Woolworths woman that it’s ok to leave small red cabbage loose, that I unload the goods into a wheeled trolley to easily facilitate unloading. “No, I don’t think so,” she replied, “I think it should go in a bag.”

There you go. The oldie knows not what he wants. The attitude is widespread. Put down old bastards at every opportunity, not especially by public servants and medical, but the private sector as well.

We learn not to protest our sanity; the local newsagent, nineteen years ago, declared oldies questioning their change or being unnecessarily loud at the counter warrants a call to the cops.

This morning I decided not to renew a monthly direct deduction and called the Commonwealth Bank to cancel that account to avoid the $5 monthly fee on extra accounts. She firstly had to check that I had declared all direct debit obligations.

At one stage in life, the onus would have been upon me to worry about that, but on oldies welfare, it transpires, I am unable to make considered decisions. If younger people could think, they would be planning now to avoid the humiliation that awaits them.

“The Big Pumpkin,” apt tag for Beaudesert’s notorious rip-off proprietor.

March 4, 2016

The Big Pumpkin will rip you off, but serial pest Reinke, won’t be present.

Red cabbages aren’t all that big. Stripped of its fibrous, unusable outer leaves, the product compares in size to that of a small rock melon. In other words, they’re not that big, but Woolworths, Beaudesert sometimes halve them for their own value-adding benefit.

I didn’t want two halves of a small cabbage, nor would I have settled for one. I wanted two complete, unmolested red cabbages. Resisting the temptation to cave-in to my ennui and just buy two half pieces and be done with it, I went across the road to the most ill-mannered rip-off merchant in town, The Big Pumpkin, of which I recently related my experiences with this prick in “The Big Pumpkin will rip you off, but…”

These strip shops are handy for quick, one item purchases but  unconscionable, crude pricks like this fellow really should be avoided, if only to keep one’s dignity. Too hungry and inconsiderate of his customer to use bags, I fronted up with two red cabbage at $4.50 each, in my own carry bag. $2.50 at Olleys if you’re passing through North Maclean.

“That’s OK” he offered as he handed me a dollar change.

“That’s OK”? I queried.

“Thanks.” he conceded.

The hell with indifferent petty crooks like this, I swear I’ll search further or go without in the future.

The Big Pumpkin will rip you off, but you won’t find pests like this one.

January 27, 2016


“Big Pumpkin,” apt tag for Beaudesert’s notorious rip-off proprietor.

The moment the words were uttered, the realization I had hexed myself was very strong; the chickens would soon come home to haunt me. Retribution came first from Woolworths Beaudesert, when their deceptive price marking had red grapes at $5.80 when real price was $7.98 doing me for two bucks. Boonah IG had reds at $2.99 but an excursion to that fair town wouldn’t have been practical without other tasks being undertaken. Over at Coles, Johanna uses similar tactics by placing expensive cuts of lamb near the cheaper off-cuts.

I had related my Big Pumpkin rip-off experiences to an acquaintance in which I stated how fixed price items are easy to keep track of at the checkout while loose items a greengrocers delight who bump the scale plate with the item and add a couple of bucks anyway. Beaudesert’s Big Pumpkin has two charming daughters well and truly versed in the art of deception with anecdotal goss has it that working for dad is mainly voluntary and real wages are pick-pocketed from careless customers. The street-smart young women are thus ready for the vagaries of life whatever opposition may face them.

BT 2/12/2015.

My appeal to this unpleasant creep that he quit pestering me have been futile. “I’m Father Christmas, the whole town loves me,” he replied to my request a few years ago that he desist. A professional ‘do-gooder’ he does the Rotary cause no good and pushes himself to an irritating, offensive degree.

“Having a bad day are we”? he’ll mutter as I pass without acknowledging him as I make my way to Aldi or Woolworths.

“Yer well, you’ll probably feel much better tomorrow.”

And so it goes until I’m out of hearing range.

The local weekly paper lauds him a hero so I must be out of touch. Shopping out of town has become a welcome distraction.

Meanwhile, back in Kooralbyn’s Countrytown Villas, a quasi Housing Commission precinct whose inhabitants, whether tenants or owners are, on the whole, more hateful than the average Australian, a foul procession of mental sickness has come and gone from the cytotoxic-friendly flat that attracts one-celled scunge, the latest object,Bill, moves outside at crow call where he lights up, then barfs uncontrollably and quite audibly, passionately expectorating pus into the foliage.

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